What Makes a Good Therapist for Kids?

Looking for a Good Therapist for Children or Teens from Foster Care?

Foster youth enter the system for different reasons. One thing all have in common is that they've experienced some form of family or life crisis. A therapist trained to help children and families process their feelings and develop coping skills and strategies can help.

Kids feel more at ease and less anxious when they get care from trained professionals. Foster families and adoptive parents go through trauma-informed care training so they, too, can best support their kids.

Nurturing parents work hard to create a loving and stable home and forever family. A good therapist, too, can make a huge difference in helping a child heal and build resilience.

Kids Who've Been in Foster Care Often Need Therapy

Every year, people report well over 7 million kids as suspected victims of neglect and child abuse. Other kids and young adult teens experience loss or abandonment, parental substance abuse, or other family crises. The process of family separation itself is traumatic for many kids. Your child in foster care may feel their world is spinning out of control.

CDC studies report that 5.8 million kids aged 3-17 years experience anxiety. Kids in foster care also have higher rates of PTSD than kids who have not been in care. With stress, anxiety, and depression often come challenging behaviors as children try to manage fear and other strong emotions. A therapist trained to help foster children can help them feel safer, calmer, and more supported.

If you have biological kids, your therapist can also help your newest adopted child process feelings and settle in. So, what qualities make a therapist right for your foster child? We're here to help manage what can feel like an overwhelming process. First, let's look at qualities you should look for in a therapist specifically for children and young people.

Qualities of a Good Child Therapist

Specialized Knowledge About Foster Care

Finding a therapist who has experience working with foster kids is important. Social workers on the front line recognize that kids in care may see the world differently after what they've been through. They may express themselves in unique ways or act out when they’re upset.

A therapist who understands foster care will know how to reach your child, listen to them, and help them work through their emotions. They’ll use proven methods for specific needs. For example, Play Therapy may be appropriate for the youngest children. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is another form of specialized therapy to help children with anxiety or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD).

Great Communication Skills

The best therapists communicate well, not just with children who've lived in foster care but with you, as a parent, too. Foster and adopted children often have complicated feelings they find hard to share. A therapist must be able to put your child at ease so they feel comfortable discussing their experiences.

Just as importantly, a good therapist must keep you informed. The therapist you choose must explain what your child is going through, suggest steps you can take at home, and keep communication open. They might recommend simple things, like keeping a mood journal or diary to help look for patterns, get feelings out, or reference dates.

Someone You and Your Child Can Trust

Trust is a quality at the top of the list. Finding the right therapist may take a little time, and it's worth taking your time. Look for someone your child feels safe with—someone who listens well and makes a real difference.

You can check ratings or ask for recommendations from other parents or your agency partner. You might also call therapists directly to ask about their experience, areas of speciality, and training qualifications. Ensure that they use scientifically backed methods. Many online sites will give you patient reviews, too.

Talk to your specialist about post-adoption services that may help support your child and family, as well.

A good therapist will gladly answer your questions and help you feel comfortable. Their willingness to spend time with you may be your first indication of a good match.

Teamwork Approach

The best therapists see you, the foster parent, as an important partner. Helping a child heal and thrive takes teamwork. A therapist should involve you in the process, suggesting ways you can support your foster or adopted child at home. You may even receive some “homework” from the therapist—things to do with your child that reinforce what they're learning in sessions.

Other people who want to ensure your child's well-being may be part of your care team, such as family members or teachers. These supportive people may include specialists from your agency or Virginia Department of Social Services (VDSS), too.

Ask What to Expect From Therapy

Every therapist has their own way of working with kids. Some therapies are short-term, and others take longer. Ask therapists what kind of treatment they provide and what you and your foster child can expect from sessions. This understanding can be helpful as you and your child prepare.

A behavioral therapist or child anxiety therapist might use a process like CBT. Another might specialize in psychoanalysis for foster care youth. Some foster care therapists may also want you or other members of your family to participate in family therapy.

Remember, move on to a new therapist if you or your child don't connect with the one you visit.

profile of a Good Therapist 

A great therapist for foster care kids understands the special experiences of children who've spent time in foster care. They're familiar with the emotions and process of foster-to-adoption. They recognize the deep emotions of kids separated from their birth parents or family through Kinship care. Many have years of experience working with children fortunate to find a loving adoptive family.

Excellent child therapists communicate well, build trust, and include you as part of your child's caring team. Above all, they connect with your child, listen carefully, and help them feel loved and supported.

Take the Leap: Adopt a Child From Foster Care

Parenting and raising a family takes commitment, no matter how you go about it. If you're ready to take the leap into foster-to-adoption, we can help.

To adopt a Virginia child in foster care, we can answer questions or help you get the process started. Becoming a foster care parent to adopt a child is a life-changing and rewarding journey. Together, we can help create loving families and a better world for Virginia children in need.